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Rakeville Times Sports Page
By STAFF / Rakeville Times
Linked By Fire
By Aviator McShadeless
When the players arrived to spring training, it was easy to fall in love with the new players. Andruw Jones garnered plenty of attention from the media, along with Michael Young and, the human-sham, Barry Bonds.
But for any real Rakeville fan, we know the season won’t lie in there hands, but rather in the hands of two Rockets whose time has come.
Drafted with their first two picks in the 2004 draft, Miguel Cabrera and Joe Mauer have quietly become the Rockets barometer. Their progression has mirrored the success of the team. Both helped change the thought process for the franchise, and now many hope they can usher in a new era.
“2004 was the only year the Rockets didn’t draft a pitcher with their first pick,” said Hobbley Hooper with WRAK sports radio. “Not only that, but they used that pick to replace the greatest Rocket in franchise history, Toby Hall.”
It was a bold move, but this season Rakeville hopes to be rewarded, as both are projected to be one of the best at their position. Never has the Rockets had position players so highly touted.
“When Joey came here, I never thought he could handle the pitching staff or the pressure,” said Toby Hall, Rakeville great and part-time hitting coach. “He got injured his rookie year, but he battled back and is in a position to lead this team.”
Many a critical eye has been placed on Mauer, but it is Cabrera, with less scrutiny, who has shined. This year it will take both 23-year-olds, along with a cast of veterans, to deliver a ring.
“Everyone on Sesame Street was gay except Oscar the Grouch,” said Troy O’Leary. “That is why he was so angry.”
Spring Training Report
By Hernandez Firstname, Pensacola Times
Barry Bonds had his first shouting match with the media Tuesday, blowing up at Rakeville Time reporter Aviator McShadeless after he asked the superstar why he still wore Haverhill Swinger underwear.
“That is the problem with media hacks like you,” he said to McShadeless. “You always try to get into my personal life.”
Bonds has shut himself off, with reporters having to register with his clubhouse butler before he talks to anyone. Pitcher Rodrigo Lopez found the idea so intriguing, he demanded reporters must do the same if they want to talk to him. So far, no one has requested a waiver.
Josh Beckett pitched off the mound for the first time this spring, striking out Omar Quintanilla 17 times in a simulated game. The non-roster invitee did hit a homerun, but only when Fernando Rodney came in to close.
In an effort to get a better look at the players, Interim General Manager Rich Garces has moved his desk onto the practice field. Sitting along the left-field line, he said it gives him a better view of the players and it is a shorter walk to the Seven Eleven on the road behind the stadium.
The trade for Michael Young has put Nomar Garciaparra in a tough position. After losing his spot at shortstop to injury and the breakout play of Felipe Lopez last season, Garciaparra finds himself without a home.
“We would like to use Nomar in a utility role,” said Garces. Garciaparra will be eligible for three infield positions, and while he hasn’t requested a trade, he is noticeable upset this spring. “We can understand his frustration, but we see a lot of value in his versatility and expect his to put up big numbers this year. One injury and he is in the starting lineup. I am very happy to have an all-star caliber replacement on this team, and he should be too.”
Late Night talk show host David Letterman bought seventeen tickets for a spring training matchup between Rakeville and Peoria, but did not hint at which team he supported.
Travel Journal: Jordan
By Jack Reed, Rakeville Rockets Director of Baseball Operations
Joe Lahoud, an Arab-American player who played major league ball for 10 seasons, is now the sports director for Amman University. While soccer is the dominant sport, he has worked hard to get funding for a baseball program.
Last week he called me, knowing I was scouring the desert, and told me he had someone for me to look at. He said his lefty ace was EHCC ready, with a 99 mph fastball.
I was actually excited when I woke that morning, and even more excited when I caught sight of the 6-5 bearded monster that would be inserted into the front of my rotation.
Lahoud wasn’t lying when he said this kid was ready. Just 21-years-old, he had three pitches that could devastate hitters, and a splitter that is effective enough. The fastball only topped out at 95, but still very respectable with tons of movement.
“So what is wrong with this guy?” I asked Lahoud.
“Nothing,” he said. “He has all the tools to become a star. He just needs better competition.”
I let that thought swirl around for a few minutes while the stud grabbed a bat and hopped into the batting cage. His brother, a complete opposite, pitched batting practice for the team. Unfortunately, he had the same excellent 95 mph fastball but none of the control of his brother.
I was calling back to the States, working out a deal to get this kid to Pensacola, when I heard a terrible scream. I ran back to the field to see the bearded beast lying on the ground clutching his face.
“He hit me in the face,” he shouted with blood seeping through his fingers.
It turns out his loving brother fractured his eye socket, and destroyed any hope that he could ever play again.
Ingersoll Student Faces Rape Charges
High School senior and track star, Mickal Vellingsly has been charged with the rape of a woman who died 19 years ago. “But I wasn’t even born then,” he said … Read more
State Finals Could Come Down to Rakeville Schools
Norton High and Stackpole High both have the same record, and both are top seeds in the Division A state tournament. The only difference is that Norton has been here before … Read more
The Rakeville Times Sports Staff funded an all-night drinking party last weekend for their closest friends, but were unable to attend themselves. Their friends were very grateful.
